i was just thinking a few days ago and came up with two new labels (i am sometimes fond of creating labels):
Context Dependent Friendships and
Context Independent Friendships.
Context Dependent Friendships are those which require a given context to function smoothly. Examples include friendships at work, in tutorials, in ccas, with regular lunch buddies, regular bus/travel buddies, and within church groups. In a certain setting relevant to the context from which the friendship was formed (e.g. a church, for church groups, school for school related groups), it feels perfectly normal to be together, and conversations come naturally. Neither party would feel particularly awkward about being seen together.
Such contexts also serve to facilitate the establishment of ties, since certain social barriers are overcome by the setting. It is thus easier to speak to a stranger at an orientation camp and strike up a friendship, compared to doing so outside of a regulated setting.
Taking the friendship outside of that context, however, would require a jump in the level of closeness in the friendship, or significant chemistry shared between persons which will lead it naturally out of that context. Such is the challenge with friendships formed from a set context. This would bring it to the realm of
Context Independent Friendships.I'm guessing that if a friendship is formed independent of a context, it will most probably not be constrained to any given context. If i were to strike up a conversation with a stranger, and we both get along and keep in touch, there is no reason why we can only feel comfortable speaking and hanging out in one fixed setting.
Context Independent Friendships can also grow to be
Context Dependent, if both parties end up in the same context later on. This usually stimulates growth because of the new anchorage, though the degree to which it will grow dependent on the context and not thrive in its absence is different in each case.
Most of my current friendships seem to be
Context Dependent. The few
Context Independent Friendships are those from the days of old: these are the individuals who transcended the context of those times and thus could survive the passing of ages.
Each is just as prone to fading.
Context Dependent Friendships can fade if the context is removed e.g. after graduation, or after a group is dissolved.
Context Independent Friendships on the other hand have the tendency to lack as firm an anchor, and can wane over time, though in some cases the friendship may thrive on non-context based entities, such as commonality of purpose, of traits, and of interests. In those cases, it is possible to look at these binding ties as metaphysical contexts, thus viewing it as a subset of
Context Dependent Friendships.
There is really nothing new about this writing, simply a categorisation of existing thoughts.
Perhaps it simply shows that for a close friendship to continue for a long time, it is necessary that it both transcends a context, and have a context within which it can nurtured.
and having posted this, i shall now return to my english project and ponder about the meaning of
yaya and
atas. one day, when Singlish is celebrated by the world, our humble works in
EL1101E Affinity Group Project may perhaps receive international acclamation. then maybe someone will invite me to write a book and i can write about
yaya and
atas and
Context Dependent Friendships and
Context Independent Friendships and all sorts of other stuff that i will end up randomly thinking about.
hope you've all been well! drop by the arts corner every now and then!
cheers,
Damien
